Poetry

Getting back into the writing classroom means I'll be putting up some poems again.

Poetry work today--well, yesterday; it was homework--involved composing respresentations of more abstract ideas and vice versa. I rather liked some of what I came up with, so I'll put them here.

Exercise: A salesman of the body for the price of sweat
Amusement: A capering buffoon
Wretchedness: The cowering of the leper beneath a thousand glares
Locality: The province [eh...got stuck on this one]
Velocity: Overtaking the world
Attraction: The strings that pull the eyes and the hand that beckons the body to follow
Dryness: A tongue’s desert
Spiciness: Arcs of lightning popping the taste buds one by one
Agitation: A taut neck below wide, unfocused eyes
Deception: The dagger in the comforting hand
Insufficiency: The withered sum in a debtor’s palm
Authority: A gavel-pounder on high
Success: A ribbon whose ends flutter in the runner’s wake

//

Puppet: Manipulation
Hummingbird: Agility
Lightbulb: Alertness
Brick: Inertia
Playing card: Risk
Newspaper: Information
Wastebasket: Rejection
Padlock: Security
Mailbox: Expectation
Dust: Neglect

//

A world retreated quicker than a thought
Although I heard no whistle of the wind
And in an instant every speck forgot:
The actions spent, the earthly portrait dimmed.
I ope’d my mouth the passage to recall
But caught not even dust to savor well,
For in departing hence in part and all
The world left not a breeze behind to tell.
I clasped my temples, and in vain I strove
To wring from them a poor, delaying trace
Of what had been; my fruitless efforts drove
The tang of sweat to bead upon my face.
But even if I wait until my last
I’ll ne’er return to nor restore the past.

We also had to write poems about a "disappearing world." The first interpretation that came to mind for me was the present disappearing into the past.

Time to tuck in.

Convocation

Sitting in the bleachers. The same as last year, but one grade up. Another flag to sign. Walking over, thinking, Okay, I signed as Trotsky last year. How shall I sign this year? Disconcerting? Progress?

No. No more shells. This year I can sign as myself.

--Peter

Old quote

"I could see V relaxing in sweatpants after a long day of killing people, but the Phantom would never be in anything less casual than a smoking jacket."

Lantern said this (the last bit is paraphrased) whilst we walked to BART from the two-week camp one day. I don't know why it came to mind right now.

Matter, form, and two wrongs do not make a right

You know you'll be engaging in a lot of philosophy when your homework consists of watching the sky.

I've picked my audition monologue. The only plays to which I have easy access are Shakespeare, TLI, and The Pillowman. A Pillowman monologue is most appropriate for One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, and T said that he wanted to hear something from me on the dramatic (vs comedic) side. I believe he mentioned he wanted to hear something that leads to some sort of release at the end. Looking through the play, it appears that the best monologue for this audition is Ariel's monologue in the third act when he prepares to torture Katurian and talks about his hatred of anybody who would even think about laying a finger on a child. It stands alone well, and it has a lot of emotional potential, just so long as I leave out the last line. It's a dark laugh, but it's a laugh line nonetheless.

I have just over a week to prepare.

Desire

We discussed desire in Humanitas: why we desire, what we desire, how Eastern schools of thought seek to eradicate desire differently from Western thought. Desire basically comes from a realization of what you do not possess, yes? Either you realize that there is no "you," that there is effectively no difference between you and what you desire, you attain literally everything you desire, or you understand that that you cannot reach the end of the road and become content with your position.

I believe that one cannot eradicate desire. At least, one cannot eradicate desire fully and live for more than a few days. Unless you desire, you may as well be a rock. Nikhil described true happiness as enlightenment, as the absence of desire, but then you may as well die, unless the happiness is its own desire. Then desire becomes something you maintain every instant. If people attempt to eradicate desire, that itself is desire. On the other hand, sometimes desire itself can be the object of desire. Thoughts like this lead one to believe that the first-degree desire is "real," whatever that means, and before long will arise a desire for the desire of desire. Confused yet? I am.

Homework for Thursday, unsurprisingly, is to make note of what I desire and understand why.

Obviously, you cannot attain everything you desire and continue to live. If you engange in the most basic of activities--eating, drinking--than you indicate a desire for future life. The only ways to escape such would be immortality or somehow existing at every point in time at once.

I desire a trip to the drinking fountain.

It begins: the sequel

First day as a senior. All of my classes, including Stats, are shaping themselves up to be interesting.

I have the same teacher for Poetry as I did for creative writing last semester. She's already thrown out to the class the possibility of taking the seminar for Honors credit. I may do so. Our first project was to write name poems. We could pick a single adjective for each letter or work them into a sentence. I chose to take the latter route:

Progressing
Every day
Till I have
Experienced the
Right life for me.

Shakespeare I will definitely be taking for Honors. I already talked about which plays we're reading. We'll also go to Ashland in late September to see Romeo & Juliet, As You Like It, and The Taming of the Shrew. I noticed throughout the day that all my classes are slightly on the large side and that I have a lot of repeating classmates.

The AP Statistics teacher is new this year, but he seems like a good find. No homework yet, but today he introduced us to a logic game called Nim (Nihm? Nym?). I was surprised that he lost one round; it looks like the sort of game where you can win every time if you know the proper trick.

Someone in Humanitas is taking it as a schedule filler. *knuckle crack* You could be denying another person who really wanted the class! Interestingly, this class appears to have two teachers aside from...I'll call him Zeus, as he rivals L. Peter Callender as a status elemental. I'm really looking forward to the meditation exercises; Bedlam's descriptions of them were highly interesting and curiosity-piquing.

Vince and Nixon are both in Classical Worlds with me. Ya-harr. As a matter of fact, eleven or so of us are returning students from his seventh-grade class. We have only one junior among us out of seventeen. This class has the largest non-text book.

Zeus is teaching The Divine Comedy as well.

The fall play was confirmed as Cuckoo's Nest. I'll audition for McMurphy (who isn't?) with Billy as my second choice. Tech Girl seems to think that role would fit me well. Better start looking for good monologues. The musical is still up in the air, but it definitely will not be Guys & Dolls.

Bedlam was visiting today! Yayyy! *Internet hug* I thought she would be at college by now, but she doesn't leave town until Friday. Come to think of it, there were several graduated seniors sighted on campus.

I switched out of T's advisory this year. Nothing personal; I'll be seeing plenty of him anyway, and I wanted to see more of Pillar before I graduated.

I have homework to do. Unorthodox homework, but homework nonetheless.

P.S. Odd dream last night: I was fitting "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" to a 3/4 meter. Not too hard, but I would like to know why?

I hope that another creative writing contest is staged this year. I have a couple of pieces in mind, and I would like an excuse to polish the end of my Lucid story.

School tomorrow...associations.

What to say?

What has been at my fingertips for these last few days? Everything or nothing?

Either way, it's about to get very specific again.

I should get to bed soon. It's relatively early, but I don't want to risk sleeping in.

Then again, isn't that what alarms are for?

I suppose I'll learn the play tomorrow. Please be TLI.

Cuckoo's Nest would be fine, but I'm really hoping for a chance to play Wargrave.

Can with blue people on it.

Pig's head on a stick.

Rolling rock.

Indiana Jones.

Harrison Ford.

How to save your marriage in seven easy steps.

Dramatic reading.

Dramatic writing.

F.

Fun and failure.

Arrested Development.

Bygone.

Graduation.

One Year.

Looking back.

Uneasy.

Snap out of it.

Glass of water.

Ice.

Liquid nitrogen.

Hasta la vista, baby.

Governator.

Eh.

Shrugging.

Gestures.

Vocal gestures.

Voice and Movement.

Omnipotent. Softy.

Goddess.

Greek Mythology.

Classical.

Beethoven.

Amadeus.

Zombies!

Survival.

Survive the coming year.

I'm a senior.

I still don't feel like it.

No choice.

I have a journey, sir, shortly to go.
My master calls me; I must not say no.