Saturday, July 19, 2008

O

If you don't get the post title, then you didn't see Romeo & Juliet. Shame on you.

Last night was our performance (technically, we're also doing a 30-minute version in SF next weekend). It went off so well. Everyone gave it their all, made new choices and discoveries, and made the audience crack up before stabbing them through the heart. I saw a lot of friends there, both old Venetians and otherwise. Furthermore, we were all blown away by how good the younger groups were this year! I have to give a shoutout to the Danes for how they handled a five-Hamlet crew. The actor changes worked extremely well.

Then came the cast party. For the past three summers it has been the highlight, the absolute highlight of the year for me. We couldn't invade Bedlam's house due to preparation for I Hate Hamlet (which I will be seeing tonight, and let no one try to stop me!), but Seductress' parents were kind enough to host (and so were mine in theory (thanks for the food!), but wended up staying there the whole time). And the OS finally came to one of our cast parties, as did our intern and stage manager! After schmoozing outside for sometime, reminiscing, exchanging congratulations, and whatnot, we briefly retired inside to watch a short commemorative video Rose had made from the many clips of what she filmed from our weeks of camp. We lost a few members after, that, sadly, but then it was time for this year's Circle of Love. We got about halfway through before retiring inside, then named and appreciated the rest inside apart from Loyal, Sunshine, and myself before succumbing to sleep. In the morning we organized a failed raid of my house for breakfast (failed because the breakfast had been dropped off back at Seductress' house), ate outside, and finished the Circle. After that we returned to the interior of the house.

When we went back inside it finally hit me that I was not coming back. Sure, I can visit, and I WILL, but this was the last summer I will get to spend working and learning and growing among these wonderful, wonderful people, people who have honestly turned my life around, and this realization caused me to collapse and start crying for the first time in years. I've been sad, to be sure; I've missed people, but I can't even remember the last time I broke down like that. The infamous last day of high school didn't even come close. I had been waiting for a breaking point for months, every so often thinking, "here it comes...nope," and it was a gift to know that I still have that in me. But the absolute best part was that, even though nobody present had ever seen me cry, I didn't feel ashamed or self-conscious in the slightest. I just felt my friends around me, comforting and...there. The relief and safety and love I felt there on the floor defies description.

Venetians, Riotous Knights, and Dreamers by any other name, you have no idea how dearly I will treasure this last week I will spend among you. I love you all from the very bottom of my heart.

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