Is this what the school head feels like at the end of the year?

‘Twas only this year in the fine month of May
That America’s abridged history was the school spring play.
The laughs kept on coming, as did the stereotypes
Italian, Indian, and cowboy, but no gripes.
We mangled the national anthem, and could you blame me
When I mangled the letter of obnoxious little Amy?
Early on was crafted a balloon dog sublime
By your own tribal elder, Wears-Sweatpants-all-the-Time.
Then lickety-split, just as quick as you please,
Vince rapped on about the thirteen colonies.
We made a mockery of the Revolutionary War
By filling it with stoners, munchkins, and cross-dressers galore.
We hastily posed for the War Not So Civil
As the announcers were caught up in their personal drivel.
At the end of act one did conspiracies abound
Backed up by creepy voices and an X-files sound.
Post-intermission we ran World War One
And let the audience in on some Super Soaker fun.
From there we moved on to the Great Depression
And Hitler, two centuries too late to be a Hessian.
(That I struggled for a rhyme there you’re well beyond guessin’.)
At last we entered the dramatic home stretch,
And Caitlin did her film noir outfit fetch
To match pace with the shade-wearing, manic and spry
Mix of Gollum and Joker: the Conspirator Guy!
And just as were assassinated civil rights leaders black
Justin was snuffed out before he could bring sexy back.
Spade Diamond was then confronted by Uncle Sam
With questions about the war in Vietnam.
Some years later our hero had a fixin’
To learn about the Cold War from President Nixon.
From there we jump to Bush Senior beggin’
For recognition from a spaced-out Reagan.
Now finally we trekked to the Berlin Wall
Where Uncle Sam and Conspirator Guy to bullets did fall,
But the feeling of conclusion was marred, oh,
By the sudden reappearance of Lucy Ricardo.
In need of a happy ending, the entire cast ran
The American timeline back to where it began.
The performance was wonderful, but I do confess
Between noodles, confetti, whipped cream (none on my dress),
The Altoids meant to be consumed in quantities less,
And who-knows-how-much water, we made a spectacular mess.

The poetry assignment was to write one alluding to a song or literary work of this generation. It got away from me a little, but no complaints.

My post title is a reference ot the school tradition: at the end of each year the head of the upper school writes a poem commemorating every graduating senoir in a manner much like this one and with similar stretches for rhymes. Every year he tries to get out of writing the poem and every time he fails.